A change in Theology

I have found once again that I am having to change my theology, the way I think about God. To be honest most of the last 10yrs has been doing just that. There was a time when I felt pretty set about the way I viewed God, I had completed three years of Bible College and I was a pastor in a church! Surely that meant I had some handle on it? But I have found that once you start to ‘press in’ to God to really get to know Him and to recognise/hear His voice then He sets about straightening out the way we perceive Him.

One thing that I had believed was that God would reveal Himself as He desired, He was God I wasn’t and as He chose, probably predestined, He would reveal Himself to me. I don’t believe that anymore, I believe we can in fact pull/require things from God that He will happily give to us, that if we hadn’t pressed in we would not receive. I believe it’s got to do with hunger.

I was at the Leaders Advance at Bethel church in California in May, one person who was in the group we were with was in a bit of a bad way, they were very desperate for change. At the end of the conference there was a fire tunnel or prayer tunnel for people to go through to receive prayer and impartation. I was behind this person as they went through this fire tunnel and as they came to Bill Johnson, the senior pastor, the line paused and they received a longer prayer. 🙂 Once passed Bill exclaimed “Wow that person Got it, they drained me, they really drained me.” This led me to ponder what that meant? I know about prayers of impartation and the importance of the laying on of hands. But what did this mean?

I believe the Lord took me to the story of the woman who had the issue of bleeding, when Jesus turned and said “who touched Me” as He had felt power drain from Him. Mark 5:21-40 It was her Faith or her desperation that ‘drew’ something from God. If she hadn’t reached out and touched/taken something from God she would still be sitting somewhere else NOT healed. Her desperation and her belief both played roles here. This story is right in the middle of the account of Jairus the desperate Dad, synagogue leader who pleaded with Jesus to come and heal his dying daughter. Both of these people pulled a very powerful response from Jesus.

Right before my eyes I had seen desperation answered, the person that received was the person that was desperate. It made me look at myself, am I desperate for more of God? Am I still hungry for more or have I somehow levelled off happy with what I have of God now? Do I even really truthfully see Him as the answer to my questions, to my needs? Do I think He cares? Do I think I have a role in pushing in?

We are now back in Australia and it is well known that one of the ruling hindrances here is apathy, this is the opposite of desperation. How far do I want to go with God? How desperate am I for His touch now? Do I even want it? Do I believe I need it, or that He would do me any good?

Jesus forgive me for my apathy and non response in my hunger for you. Lord I know that you are the answer to my every question. Lord I AM desperate for you, for you to show up.

I now Believe we can draw things down from Heaven onto Earth certainly not with works but with desperation & hunger. We can move the Heart of Heaven (God) from down here. What are you desiring from Heaven? What are you drawing from Heaven? What are your hearts desires and what are you doing with them?